Toby
September 8, 1997 — September 10, 2011
UPDATE 9-25-2011—
My precious Toby came in to my life 9/8/97 and departed from me 9/10/11. My Toby was diagnosed with HEMANGIOSARCOMA of the spleen 4.5 years ago and had an emergency Spleenectomy which revealed a burst tumor in his abdominal cavity. The Vet gave Toby 3 months to live with or without treatment and I made the decision to forgo treatment as the “odds” of Toby surviving through the chemotherapy was small and I wanted him to live out whatever time he had happy. I was BLESSED to be given 4.5 years after Toby’s surgery and diagnosis. In the 4.5 years, my precious dog went from 103 pounds to 50 pounds before he died. He remained happy, he didn’t show signs of being sick or being in pain on the outside, and lived knowing he was loved.
The truth is I needed Toby more than he needed me. In the end, Toby’s kidneys and liver were affected by both age and the cancer. In his final days I fed him water and soft food from a bottle, carried him outside when I thought he needed to eliminate, took him for a couple of car rides and making sure he knew I loved him so very much. I wanted Toby to go naturally because I just didn’t want to make the decision to let him go. The final nights of Toby’s life I slept on the floor near his bed of lush pillows and blankets in the event he needed water. On Friday evening the day before Toby’s passing I knew that he wasn’t going to make it through the weekend. The morning of 9/10/11 I awoke at 5:00 a.m and realized Toby was in the dying process, his eyes were in a blank stare as if he wasn’t there and his breathing was shallow. I just couldn’t watch my beloved dog go so I called the Vet to my home. I couldn’t watch my Toby be put down nor could I wrap him in a blanket and put him in the hole I had dug earlier so my brother and the Vet did until he was half way buried and I could take over. It breaks my heart knowing that pets come in to our hearts so quickly and show us the meaning of love and can be taken from us by something so horrible as canine cancer. I was one of the lucky ones who got 4.5 years after my Toby’s diagnosis and I believe it’s because Toby knew I needed him and couldn’t give him up. To all those who have lost or are in the process of losing their beloved pet to cancer, no matter what your decision is for their future, never give up on them, and love them as much as you can. Toby may be gone but he is in my heart forever.
— Cynthia
10 responses so far ↓
1 Evie // Nov 6, 2011 at 8:40 pm
Cindy,
What a beautiful story, There was no question about Toby knowing how much you loved him, that’s why he hung in there so long. I have seen that with people as well as animals. Love is very powerful. Abby did the same for me, when I needed her.
Now we have a concerned with our Hana. We (our vet) have been watching Hana’s lumps and bumps, she has developed a large lump on her front leg, and it looks and feels different. She will be having a biopsy next Monday. Cross your fingers for her, She and Hunter are really starting to show their age. It will be a very black day when their time comes. Animals can teach us how to love. Toby will always be in your heart. Love you, Evie
2 Virginia S. // Nov 7, 2011 at 1:33 pm
I know how much you can love…I love you. Mom
3 Ellen // Nov 12, 2011 at 1:56 pm
Hi Cindy,
What a heart felt story. It touched me in that I had a very similiar experience with Sammie. He was diagnosed at 8 with the same cancer. They removed the spleen, and told me Sammie had 6-8 weeks to live. I did not do chemo. I was very fortunate in that I found a holistic nutrtionist that guided me through Sammie’s cancer. I lost him five years later. He is still and always will be the love of my life.
Ellen
4 Gloria // Dec 29, 2011 at 12:02 pm
My soul mate dog was diagnosed with hermangiosarcoma yesterday and your story will stay up on my computer screen. Thank you so much for taking the time to write.
5 Karen S. // Jan 13, 2012 at 11:13 am
Your stories are so encouraging! My family’s 10 year old boxer was recently diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma that does not involve the spleen. She had a very large mass removed from her abdomen a month ago, has recovered beautifully, and is transitioning to a high protein, low carb diet that is partially home-made. And I need help! Ellen & Cynthia, how can I get in touch with you to learn more about how you supported your dogs?
6 Karen S. // Jan 13, 2012 at 11:14 am
PS – She is also taking 3 Chinese herbal preparations.
7 Susie Gu // Feb 24, 2012 at 8:38 pm
Dear Cindy and Ellen,
My golden Star was found the HEMANGIOSARCOMA of the spleen few days ago. We did a surgery which took away the spleen. I was so sad when I was told by the vet that he had only three months left, until I saw your stories which were so touching and so supportive to me. My husband and I both decided that we give up chemotherapy. Would you please give me some suggestions what kind of therapy you took to your beautiful dogs, and what we should do? Thanks a million!!!
8 Susie Gu // Feb 24, 2012 at 8:40 pm
Dear Karen,
What kind of Chinese herbal preparations your dog is taking? would you share with me? Thank you very much!
9 Cynthia // Mar 2, 2012 at 3:41 pm
I am so glad that my story of my precious dog Toby touch you all. Even today, I miss him just as much as I did the day he passed. I wanted to let you all know that I did not use any alternative medicine as Ellen did. I fed my Toby a dog food that was low in fat and made of chicken, vegtables, and apples. This is the only change I made and gave him all the love I could give him. I believe opting out of chemotherapy was the best choice I made for him as I know I would have lost him so much earlier. My heart is saddened by your stories and saddened that sickeness exsists in this world. Continue loving your pet and helping them find joy in whatever time they have left.
10 Pam // Mar 7, 2012 at 8:03 pm
Cynthia, your story of Toby is very touching and hopeful. My boy Thor was diagnosed just over 3 weeks ago. They told me he had a day or two to a month to live. I am hoping for much more. He has heart issues so surgery and chemo are out of the question. He is almost 11 and suffers from chronic pancreatits so changing his diet is out of the question as well. We have added milk thistle and am looking at other supplements. I did stop his fish oil as it thins he blood.
For now he is doing well and was playing with my other dog just a 1/2 hr ago. I wish I could let them play full out, but I can’t let him risk a rupture of the tumor.
I would love to have the 4.5 yrs you had, but I doubt that will happen. I would love to have 4.5 months though.
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